It looks like I won't make it home for the holidays. By home, i mean the home of one of my sisters or my niece. North Carolina. Virginia.
There are too many reasons why I am in this situation at this time in this place with these circumstances.
I am kind of a push over, and I let the job scare me into not taking days off. Other staff grabbed up all the days off. A project that I worked on is still in its infancy, and I'm afraid something will come up, something will need doing. My job is not that important, but I don't know who to try to con into covering my bullshit responsibilities...and it would be hard as hell to train somebody or document all of it. It's bullshit.
I am 750 miles away from where I grew up, 500 miles from my nearest family member who I would ordinarily see over holidays. I don't have family down here, but there is someone to spend Christmas with.
I guess I'm a Florida guy now, for real. This is where I live. This is home I guess. This is the place where I need to 'build a life.'
I'm here. I'm 'radically self reliant.' I got ants crawling on me. If I stand outside twenty minutes or longer, I will start to burn. I don't have to go far to retire. I wore shorts outside yesterday. I wear flip flops...often. I battle super mold with bleach and rarely win. I battle slow drivers. I battle fast drivers. There are weird birds here. Lightning strikes more here than anywhere. I was all wrong in my impressions of this place here. I never get sick here. I get bored here. Nothing ever dries here...but if it does, it bursts into flames.